You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
