At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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