Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
