69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
