Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
