I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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