I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
