And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
