i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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