Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
