The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
