why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
the liver wants what the liver wants
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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