Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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