Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just found puke in my bra..
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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