My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
