Porn is love you can see.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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