Whoa Z and x make the same sound
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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