how do flat chested girls get laid?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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