but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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