No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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