and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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