it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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