i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
