i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
too bad you live with your parents still
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
