I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
