meet me or not, i'm out of control
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
