I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Randomize
