What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
