Dual....:-)
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Randomize
