...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
