Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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