Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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