addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
