She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
