They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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