Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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