This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
i've created a new STD.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
