ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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