but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
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