her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
