I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
