It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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