don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
