Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
