biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
