My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
