he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
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