I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
