I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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