Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
